We all know we’re supposed to be good at active listening.
And we all probably feel we’re above average at it. “It’s ‘only’ listening – how hard can it be?”
But unfortunately, half of us will be worse than average.
Because that’s how averages work!
So how can we raise our game? How can we become better at active listening?
Here’s my favourite way. Just ask…
TELL ME MORE?
Because, when you do, they’ll always tell you something more!
Which means we have more to actively listen to.
For example:
Us: What’s your main priority this week?
Them: To do a great job in Friday’s meeting with Mrs X
Us: That sounds important. TELL ME MORE – what’s your meeting about?
Them: Well… (and then they’ll open-up. Which, of course, gives us a lot to actively listen, and then respond, to)
Also: we can then ask more follow-up questions, to delve even deeper. These will begin with a question word – WHY, WHAT, HOW etc: Examples:
- WHY is this meeting so important?
- WHAT are you hoping to achieve from it?
- HOW are you planning to achieve that?
- WHEN are you doing your prep?
- HOW can I best help you?
- etc
And that’s it. It’s as simple and as difficult as that.
Ask questions to open them up.
And then let them speak.
And, when you’re about to interrupt them (which would be terrible ‘active listening’), remember the acronym WAIT = Why Am I Talking?
Action Point
Who’s your first meeting with today? Would it be appropriate to ask them the follow-up question “TELL ME MORE?”.
If so, ask it. After all, they will then tell you more…
Trust me on this: if you don’t do it now, you never will.